Monday 5 November 2012

All About Love: What is Unconditional Love? Conditional love?

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All About Love: What is Unconditional Love? Conditional love?


The Unconditional love is known as affection without any limitations. This term is sometimes associated with other terms such as true altruism, complete love, or "mother's love." Each area of expertise has a certain way of describing unconditional love, but most will agree that it is that type of love which has no bounds and is unchanging. It is a concept comparable to true love, a term which is more frequently used to describe love between lovers. By contrast, unconditional love is frequently used to describe love between family members, comrades in arms and between others in highly committed relationships. An example of this is a parent's love for their child; no matter a test score, a life changing decision, an argument, or a strong belief, the amount of love that remains between this bond is seen as unchanging and unconditional.

In religion, unconditional love is thought to be part of The Four Loves; affection, friendship, romance, and unconditional. In ethology, or the study of animal behavior, unconditional love would refer to altruism which in turn refers to the behavior by individuals that increases the fitness of another while decreasing the fitness of the individual committing the act. In psychology, unconditional love would refer to a state of mind in which the individual has the goal of increasing the welfare of another, despite any evidence of benefit for them self. The term is also widely used in family and couples counseling manuals.

What is The Four Loves?

The Four Loves is a book by C. S. Lewis which explores the nature of love from a Christian perspective through thought experiments.

The content of the examination is prefaced by Lewis' admission that he initially mistook St. John's words "God is Love" as a simple beginning point to address the topic. But further meditation revealed two different kinds of love: "need-love" (such as the love of a child for its mother) as distinguished from "gift-love" (epitomized by God's love for humanity). Lewis happened upon the insight that the natures of even these basic categorizations of love are more complicated than they seem at first.

As a result of this, he formulates the foundation of his topic by exploring the nature of pleasure, and then divides love into four categories ("the highest does not stand without the lowest"), based in part on the four Greek words for love: affection, friendship, eros, and charity. Lewis states that just as Lucifer—a former archangel—perverted himself by pride and fell into depravity, so too can love—commonly held to be the arch-emotion—become corrupt by presuming itself to be what it is not.

A fictional treatment of these loves is the main theme of Lewis's novel Till We Have Faces.

Conditional love?

Some authors make a distinction between unconditional love and conditional love. In conditional love: love is 'earned' on the basis of conscious or unconscious conditions being met by the lover, whereas in unconditional love, love is 'given freely' to the loved one 'no matter what'. Loving first. Conditional love requires some kind of finite exchange, whereas unconditional love is seen as infinite and measureless. Unconditional love should not be mistaken with unconditional dedication: unconditional dedication refers to an act of the will irrespective of feelings (e.g. a person may consider they have a duty to stay with a person); unconditional love is an act of the feelings irrespective of will.

Unconditional love separates the individual from her or his behaviors. However, the individual may exhibit behaviors that are unacceptable in a particular situation. To begin with a simple example: one acquires a puppy. The puppy is cute, playful, and the owner's heart swells with love for this new family member. Then the puppy urinates on the floor. The owner does not stop loving the puppy, but needs to modify the behavior through training and education.

Humanistic psychologist Carl Rogers spoke of an unconditional positive regard. Rogers stated that the individual needed an environment that provided them with genuineness, authenticity, openness, self-disclosure, acceptance, empathy, and approval.

Also Abraham Maslow supported the unconditional perspective by saying that in order to grow, an individual had to have a positive perspective of themselves.

Neurological basis

There has been some evidence to support a neural basis for unconditional love, showing that it stands apart from other types of love.

In a study conducted by Mario Beauregard and his colleagues, using an fMRI procedure, they studied the brain imaging of participants who were shown different sets of images either referring to "maternal love" (unconditional love) or "romantic love". Seven areas of the brain became active when these participants called to mind feelings of unconditional love. Three of these were similar to areas that became active when it came to romantic love. The other four active parts were different, showing certain brain regions associated with rewarding aspects, pleasurable (non sexual) feelings, and human maternal behaviors are activated during the unconditonal love portions of the experiment. Through the associations made between the different regions, results show that the feeling of love for someone without the need of being rewarded is different from the feeling of romantic love.

Along with the idea of "mother's love", which is associate with unconditional love, a study found patterns in the neuroendocrine system and motivation-affective neural system. Using the fMRI procedure, mother's watched a video of them playing with their children in a familiar environment, like home. The procedure found part of the amygdala and nucleus accumbens were responsive on levels of emotion and empathy. Emotion and empathy (compassion) are descriptives of love, therefore it supports the idea that the neural occurrences are evidence of unconditional love.

Religious perspective

Christianity

In Christianity, the term "unconditional love" would be more accurately expressed as Christ's forgiveness. It may also be used to indicate God's love for a person irrespective of that person's love for God. The term is not explicitly used in the Bible and advocates for God's conditional or unconditional love, using different passages or interpretations to support their point of view, are both encountered. It may be considered to be closely associated with another non-explicitly biblical, but commonly encountered saying: "God loves the sinner, but hates the sin".

While the phrase has never been used in its official teachings documents the then head of the Roman Catholic Church, Pope John Paul II was recorded as saying during a homily in San Francisco, in September 1987, that God "loves us all with an unconditional, everlasting love". He explored issues touching upon this theme in his work Dives in Misericordia (1980) in which the parable of the Prodigal Son becomes a framework for exploring the issue of God's mercy. The civil rights leader Martin Luther King Jr. was quoted as saying “I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality”. Source: Wikipedia

Videos about Unconditional Love and Conditional love
What Is Unconditional Love?


Conditional Love

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